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My story - so no-one else has to

# 1  7/17/13 12:50 AM

Posts: 1
bbwlover This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Man, 31
United Kingdom
Birmingham
Naughty newbie

Basically, my marriage ended a few months ago, after a eventful few months which started out as heaven, and ended up as hell... I admit i rushed into marrying my wife (we we're wed before we had even been together 5 months), and, as you would expect, during the honeymoon period, everything was fantastic

Of course, this was not to last


Over a period of time, my wife changed. Subtle differences at first, like snapping over tiny things, but then an immediate apology, to **** irritation at me showing her affection. Things began to get worse, and more serious. She started to hang around with her **** partner more and more often, ignoring my texts while she was out, excuses were made as to why she didn't want to be seen out in public with me, cruel insults began to creep in. I have suffered from depression for several years, unsurprisingly, this bought forth the old demons.

My **** response to this, instead of making me feel wanted and like i was her husband, was to sleep with her **** partner.

I then went into a borderline suicidal slump, culminating in an overdose of antidepressants and self harming.

At this point, the **** began. First it was a slap, then a punch to the jaw, then, a full on broken nose

Finally, a kitchen knife stabbed directly into my left hand. The tendons had to be surgically reattached and a full graft was needed. I'm still going thru physiotherapy now. My left hand will never have full proper movement again.

And still, i was stupid enough (or blinded enough by love) to not tell anyone the truth. Doctors were told i had an accident while cooking, friends the same. I genuinely believed my wife would change, and we would get thru this. And, for a time (maybe a month) she seemed different, more back to the woman i married. But then, old habits began to reappear. The comments about me being fat and replusive, the flirting with other men, then progressing again to the hair pulling, before long the closed fists came back, before finally i was thrown out of the marital home.

Anyone out there(male or female), if ANY of this story rings a bell, please please do something before there is no going back. In some ways i am lucky, the knife only hit a limb. Things could have been much worse. No-one deserves this...

So now, here i am, hoping that someone will restore my faith in humanity and there will be someone out there who doesn't find the thought of having to spend a couple of hours in a public place with me as embarrasing. Weird how things turn out!

# 2  7/17/13 8:50 AM

Posts: 5473
karsic_karl This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Man, 53
United Kingdom
Sandiacre
Been Naughtiest

Gosh, that must have taken a lot of bravery to write.

It must be very hard to be with someone that you love who doesn't feel the same way.
Even harder when they become hostile.

Sounds like you have been very, very unlucky.

Do hope you have better luck in the future.

And welcome to the forum.

# 3  7/17/13 9:13 AM

Posts: 32591
DD_67 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Woman, 47
Ireland
****
Love expert

bbwlover wrote:

Basically, my marriage ended a few months ago, after a eventful few months which started out as heaven, and ended up as hell... I admit i rushed into marrying my wife (we we're wed before we had even been together 5 months), and, as you would expect, during the honeymoon period, everything was fantastic

Of course, this was not to last


Over a period of time, my wife changed. Subtle differences at first, like snapping over tiny things, but then an immediate apology, to **** irritation at me showing her affection. Things began to get worse, and more serious. She started to hang around with her **** partner more and more often, ignoring my texts while she was out, excuses were made as to why she didn't want to be seen out in public with me, cruel insults began to creep in. I have suffered from depression for several years, unsurprisingly, this bought forth the old demons.

My **** response to this, instead of making me feel wanted and like i was her husband, was to sleep with her **** partner.

I then went into a borderline suicidal slump, culminating in an overdose of antidepressants and self harming.

At this point, the **** began. First it was a slap, then a punch to the jaw, then, a full on broken nose

Finally, a kitchen knife stabbed directly into my left hand. The tendons had to be surgically reattached and a full graft was needed. I'm still going thru physiotherapy now. My left hand will never have full proper movement again.

And still, i was stupid enough (or blinded enough by love) to not tell anyone the truth. Doctors were told i had an accident while cooking, friends the same. I genuinely believed my wife would change, and we would get thru this. And, for a time (maybe a month) she seemed different, more back to the woman i married. But then, old habits began to reappear. The comments about me being fat and replusive, the flirting with other men, then progressing again to the hair pulling, before long the closed fists came back, before finally i was thrown out of the marital home.

Anyone out there(male or female), if ANY of this story rings a bell, please please do something before there is no going back. In some ways i am lucky, the knife only hit a limb. Things could have been much worse. No-one deserves this...

So now, here i am, hoping that someone will restore my faith in humanity and there will be someone out there who doesn't find the thought of having to spend a couple of hours in a public place with me as embarrasing. Weird how things turn out!

What a hard story to read, it must have been really hard to write and a nightmare to live through.  But you have lived through it, and it's time to move forward.  I wish you luck.

# 4  7/17/13 10:56 AM

Posts: 12087
RitchieRich44 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Man, 50
United Kingdom
Cambridge
**** expert

Yours is a depressingly common story, and in a perverse way it's good to remind people that it isn't just women who suffer domestic abuse. It's easy to excuse such behavior as "well he/she didn't mean it, he/she loves me really". He/she may really love you, but if the relationship is making you feel bad, is it worth hanging on to a relationship which, let's be honest, is not going to change.
The sad thing is, people who have been in a relationship which any outsider would say is abusive are quite likely, if they have the courage to leave that relationship, to start a similar relationship with someone else.

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