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Would ya.....

# 1  2/1/12 11:13 PM

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Kadu12 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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want to know if you'd been in a relationship for over a year and your partner had been being intimate with someone else for most of that time.

Is ignorance bliss?

You'd been suspicious and the affair, but it had been denied numerous times.

Would you really really want to know?

# 2  2/1/12 11:34 PM

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billygoat365 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Kadu12 wrote:

want to know if you'd been in a relationship for over a year and your partner had been being intimate with someone else for most of that time.

Is ignorance bliss?

You'd been suspicious and the affair, but it had been denied numerous times. O

Would you really really want to know?

I'd want to know the truth. And why.
And then I'd want her out of my life.

# 3  2/1/12 11:54 PM

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Kadu12 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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billygoat365 wrote:

Kadu12 wrote:

want to know if you'd been in a relationship for over a year and your partner had been being intimate with someone else for most of that time.

Is ignorance bliss?

You'd been suspicious and the affair, but it had been denied numerous times. O

Would you really really want to know?

I'd want to know the truth. And why.
And then I'd want her out of my life.

Why would you want to know the truth? What difference would the why make?

# 4  2/1/12 11:57 PM

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Dee1970 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Sometimes suspicion eats away at you more than knowing something bad.  It's hard to say without being there, but I might want to know if I still had suspicions even if it was over.   I'd definitely want to know if I was still in the relationship with him. 

Dee

# 5  2/1/12 11:58 PM

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ScotsBird This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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I'd want to know the truth as well and wouldn't care about the why.  Find out and move on.

# 6  2/1/12 11:58 PM

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billygoat365 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Kadu12 wrote:

billygoat365 wrote:

Kadu12 wrote:

want to know if you'd been in a relationship for over a year and your partner had been being intimate with someone else for most of that time.

Is ignorance bliss?

You'd been suspicious and the affair, but it had been denied numerous times. O

Would you really really want to know?

I'd want to know the truth. And why.
And then I'd want her out of my life.

Why would you want to know the truth? What difference would the why make?

Otherwise I'd always be wondering why. And I wouldn't be able to move on.

# 7  2/1/12 11:58 PM

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PUMPKINPOSITIVE This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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If it had been denied but it was actually happening. I would want to know why the denial? As that denial is a lie .

# 8  2/2/12 12:05 AM

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Kadu12 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Dee1970 wrote:

Sometimes suspicion eats away at you more than knowing something bad.  It's hard to say without being there, but I might want to know if I still had suspicions even if it was over.   I'd definitely want to know if I was still in the relationship with him. 

Dee

I get that, it has done. So you could possibly know, rebuild and move past it?

# 9  2/2/12 12:06 AM

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Kadu12 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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ScotsBird wrote:

I'd want to know the truth as well and wouldn't care about the why.  Find out and move on.

Why would you want to know the truth?

# 10  2/2/12 12:08 AM

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Kadu12 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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PUMPKINPOSITIVE wrote:

If it had been denied but it was actually happening. I would want to know why the denial? As that denial is a lie .

Cake and **** it springs to mind...would the lie regards the denial be more important than the affair?

# 11  2/2/12 12:09 AM

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billygoat365 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Kadu12 wrote:

ScotsBird wrote:

I'd want to know the truth as well and wouldn't care about the why.  Find out and move on.

Why would you want to know the truth?

Because the truth is important to me.
Just give me the facts ma'am.

# 12  2/2/12 12:10 AM

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ScotsBird This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Kadu12 wrote:

ScotsBird wrote:

I'd want to know the truth as well and wouldn't care about the why.  Find out and move on.

Why would you want to know the truth?

Because I'd be more upset about the deception than the actual ****.  If you don't have trust in a relationship then in my opinion you have nothing.  And I mean trust in every aspect of it.  For me, that extends beyond **** Kads.

# 13  2/2/12 12:16 AM

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Dee1970 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Kadu12 wrote:

Dee1970 wrote:

Sometimes suspicion eats away at you more than knowing something bad.  It's hard to say without being there, but I might want to know if I still had suspicions even if it was over.   I'd definitely want to know if I was still in the relationship with him. 

Dee

I get that, it has done. So you could possibly know, rebuild and move past it?

Yeah, but then I'm possibly in a minority.  I think I could cope with sharing someone

It would be the lying about it that would change my feelings towards them.  I guess if I could understand why they needed to do it and be dishonest about it there's the possibility I might still think they were worth another go.  But it would take a lot of soul searching of myself and of them through talking it out, and then a long while to build back that lost trust.  If there was ever any hint of it happening again that would be it - head would rule heart.

Dee

# 14  2/2/12 12:31 AM

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Kadu12 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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So far the vote goes for truth....I'm pretty sure I'd want to know if it were I'd been in the same situation.

Lets see what the morning crew have to say on the matter

# 15  2/2/12 1:53 AM

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flexible*1 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Kadu12 wrote:

So far the vote goes for truth....I'm pretty sure I'd want to know if it were I'd been in the same situation.

Lets see what the morning crew have to say on the matter

Not sure if I qualify as 'the morning crew' but I'd agree with truth... and I can say (from experience) that you can forgive and move on to rebuilding ... IF your partner is interested in being honest about the new rules - monogamous or otherwise. I reckon it's much easier to know the facts and be able to make an informed decision, than to wonder.

# 16  2/2/12 8:43 AM

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PUMPKINPOSITIVE This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Kadu12 wrote:

PUMPKINPOSITIVE wrote:

If it had been denied but it was actually happening. I would want to know why the denial? As that denial is a lie .

Cake and **** it springs to mind...would the lie regards the denial be more important than the affair?

Yeah I think the denial would annoy me most . I have meet the parents robert de niro lie detector skills honed from a life of work  dealing with wankers . . . .  I hate being lied to .

# 17  2/2/12 9:27 AM

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aries51 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Kadu12 wrote:

want to know if you'd been in a relationship for over a year and your partner had been being intimate with someone else for most of that time.

Is ignorance bliss?

You'd been suspicious and the affair, but it had been denied numerous times.

Would you really really want to know?

Ignorance  IS bliss   

but if your suspicious  ,then usually theres good reason   for that   ,no smoke without fire   etc   (  mebbies )    ,and yes  ,the lying is worse than the affair   ............  it must be hard to build a repair job after that  length of time   .......... a year is a long time    ,its not like a one night stand   or a moment of madness  /lust whatever you like to call it   .........

# 18  2/2/12 9:33 AM

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TalentedAngel This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
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Kadu12 wrote:

want to know if you'd been in a relationship for over a year and your partner had been being intimate with someone else for most of that time.

Is ignorance bliss?

You'd been suspicious and the affair, but it had been denied numerous times.

Would you really really want to know?

1) I wouldn't want to know, but I wear him out so I don't think he would have the energy
2) I have never felt the need to question him, but the last thing I would want him to do is lie, that would finish the relationship
3) No

# 19  2/2/12 10:18 AM

Posts: 7362
Kadu12 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Woman, 48
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flexible*1 wrote:

Kadu12 wrote:

So far the vote goes for truth....I'm pretty sure I'd want to know if it were I'd been in the same situation.

Lets see what the morning crew have to say on the matter

Not sure if I qualify as 'the morning crew' but I'd agree with truth... and I can say (from experience) that you can forgive and move on to rebuilding ... IF your partner is interested in being honest about the new rules - monogamous or otherwise. I reckon it's much easier to know the facts and be able to make an informed decision, than to wonder.

Oooooh..nice picture, you could be on my morning crew anytime

Thanks for your input

# 20  2/2/12 10:20 AM

Posts: 7362
Kadu12 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Woman, 48
United Kingdom
Scunthorpe
Needs a spanking

aries51 wrote:

Kadu12 wrote:

want to know if you'd been in a relationship for over a year and your partner had been being intimate with someone else for most of that time.

Is ignorance bliss?

You'd been suspicious and the affair, but it had been denied numerous times.

Would you really really want to know?

Ignorance  IS bliss   

but if your suspicious  ,then usually theres good reason   for that   ,no smoke without fire   etc   (  mebbies )    ,and yes  ,the lying is worse than the affair   ............  it must be hard to build a repair job after that  length of time   .......... a year is a long time    ,its not like a one night stand   or a moment of madness  /lust whatever you like to call it   .........

Yeah I understand that, but you've dodged the question 

Would you want to be told about the affair. Would you want to know or would you prefer to be blissfully ignorant.

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