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Is it wrong to ask a potenial mate what the future holds for us?

# 1  8/25/12 11:37 PM

Posts: 12
kudzu45414 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Woman, 42
United States
Augusta
Naughty newbie

I'm currently having phone conversations with a guy that's a single parent of two and have a full time job and is also seeking pt work. I asked the question of when would you have time for me in your life. He replied that I was only thinking about myself when I asked that question. Am I wrong to want to know my future with this guy?

# 2  9/18/12 6:26 AM

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Posts: 50
paulj39908 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Man, 34
Canada
Kelowna
Naughty newbie

I am not sure a better question could be asked. I was lucky enough to have that asked to me, in a different context. and i changed my life to accommodate what life may bring me not just my scene then. I over worked and over volunteered and left no time for anyone special so I changed. and when I did meet that person I had already built a margin into my life. so keep asking those questions it shows his priority and you have the right to know if its not you.

# 3  10/1/12 8:11 PM

Posts: 119
readingdave*1 This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Man, 46
United States
Ridgway
Naughty newbie

paulj39908 wrote:

I am not sure a better question could be asked. I was lucky enough to have that asked to me, in a different context. and i changed my life to accommodate what life may bring me not just my scene then. I over worked and over volunteered and left no time for anyone special so I changed. and when I did meet that person I had already built a margin into my life. so keep asking those questions it shows his priority and you have the right to know if its not you.

I've got to agree with Paul here.  Now, the answer might be, he can't make the time by himself.  Which, I can imagine, might offer a whole host of questions that he doesn't have time to concive of right now.  My advice is if you are intrested in this guy, set some boundries and find time where you can be together, even if it is with others around.

# 4  11/16/13 5:24 PM

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Chilled This member uses the Web version of BeNaughty
Man, 49
United States
Florida
Naughty newbie

kudzu45414 wrote:

I'm currently having phone conversations with a guy that's a single parent of two and have a full time job and is also seeking pt work. I asked the question of when would you have time for me in your life. He replied that I was only thinking about myself when I asked that question. Am I wrong to want to know my future with this guy?

It really depends on how far into the relationship you are.  Some topics can be brought too soon to disastrous results; whereas, if they ware brought 3 or 4 conversations later, they would have been welcomed.  Context is important.  Know something about who you're talking to… the real story, not just the story they give.  Often, there's a whole other reality waiting to be discovered.  peace

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